The option to smoke in a hotel room is dwindling by the day, regardless of the herb being consumed. Tobacco, marijuana, vapor, and more all leave trace residues all over a room if left unchecked, and best believe any hotel will jump at the chance to fine you for the trouble.
Smoke and smoke smells can be extremely difficult to remove from furniture, bedding, walls, and decor, so can we really blame them? But sometimes, that fine upwards of $300 is just too much to take.
If you want to toke and smoke in a hotel room without the financial consequences, we’ve got you covered. Just know, if you get caught, you didn’t hear it from us!
Steps to Take
We’ve compiled a list of steps you can take or tips you can employ to make your smoking experience easier in a less than tolerant hotel room, though we’re sure this works in the bedroom of your parents house too.
Make a Sploof
Sploofs are an incredible makeshift filter made with a paper towel or toilet paper roll stuffed with dryer sheets. The whole point is to take a drag on whatever you’re smoking, and breathe out through the sploof. This might not catch every atom of smoke smell, but it certainly helps!
The dryer sheets prove themselves helpful at filtering odors and making it harder to determine what the smell actually is. It’s not foolproof, but definitely makes a difference when combined with other tips on this list.
Get rid of Evidence
One of the biggest things hotel cleaning crews will look for if they suspect smoking in the room is evidence. Roaches, cigarette butts, and more are likely to end up in the trash, beside the ashtray, in the toilet etc. These are all big rookie mistakes. If you’re smoking in an environment where smoking isn’t allowed, get rid of everything when you’re done!
Don’t just throw away your wraps, flush them down the toilet. Wrap them up in toilet paper and take them with you when you leave. Don’t leave them lying around to be found. Once they’re in plain sight, you can say goodbye to your discreet smoking routine.
Turn the Shower into a Steam Room
If you’re staying in a hotel room, chances are you have a bathroom with a stand up shower. This offers some of the best and easiest ways of getting rid of a dank smoke smell.
You’ll want to turn on the shower as hot as it goes and close the door. A fan can be turned on after a while, but the whole point is to smoke in the steamy area. Doing this allows the smoke to mix with the humidity in the air, the steam dissipates after a while and takes the smell with it.
A shower is also often double lined for water protection, making it difficult for water, smells, and other substances like smoke to get through.
Cover Smoke Alarm
This one might be one of the very first most obvious things folks think of when they consider sneaky smoking in a hotel room. Sometimes, though disconnecting the smoke alarm triggers a building wide alarm to sound, alerting everyone to your situation.
Instead of disconnecting the smoke alarm, we recommend covering it with a wet washcloth or towel. The towel acts as a filter while the wetness ensures the smoke has trouble getting through.
Wet Towel Under Doors
When smoking in an unfamiliar or less than tolerant space, you want to make sure that the smoke is as contained as possible. Whether that means hotboxing a steam room shower or sitting in the main area, you don’t want your smoke to escape.
To avoid this, a good idea to seal the underside of any door is to roll up a damp towel and stuff it between the floorboards and the bottom of the door. While you might not get the towel under the door specifically, having the damp filter against the bottom crack will help the smoke to stay in the room and in the room only.
Air Out The Room
Following up on the last tip, the ideal situation is to have the smoke contained to the room you’re in as much as possible while you’re smoking. Once finished though, a thick cloud of musky smoke is a dead give away that activists have taken place there. Literally a smoking gun.
Depending on the hotel you choose, they might have windows that can be cracked or opened. If this is the case, turning a fan toward the window to drag the smoke closer to the exit can help air out the space before anyone can catch on. If the window doesn’t open, a fan fed from the outside can help with this as well, though it might take a little longer.
The Best Case Scenario
In a situation where smoking isn’t allowed in any given hotel room, turn on the shower as hot as it goes and stay in the bathroom while it gets hot and steamy. Wet a washcloth and a towel, and cover the smoke detector and seal the bottom of the door. When finished smoking, dispose of the remains in the toilet and flush. Then turn on the fan in the bathroom, and seal the bathroom as you leave so that the smoke can dissipate without escaping.
Broadly speaking, hotels are a business whose focus is to make money and preserve their property. Protecting yourself against exposure and protecting their property, being respectful and responsible with your smoking habits can help everyone involved to leave the situation happy.
Tipping your cleaning crew never hurts, but if you follow all these tips and come up with what works for you, those crazy over priced fines for smoking in the hotel room can be a thing of the past.
Be sure to stay safe, vigilant, and on top of your smoking experience by protecting yourself and those around you from potential risks. Fires, electrical issues, water damage, and more can really put a damper on things and cost more in the long run.